The point about not venting to colleagues deserves its own headline. When a boss undermines you, the temptation is to find allies by complaining, and it feels like relief, but it also hands the boss a second story to tell about you: that you are negative, that you gossip. Your notebook idea is the safer outlet. What happened, what was said, who was there, no interpretation. It keeps you factual in the moment and gives you something solid if you ever need HR or a new manager to understand the pattern. I write about this kind of situation in a book called WorkWars, for anyone who wants more on it; just message me [book].
Oof, I needed to read this today. It's too tempting to become bitchy and unprofessional when you feel like you are being slighted or diminished. Good article!
Rock on. I so could have used this information in my 20’s and 30’s. Keep telling the truth!
Right? I don’t know if I could have kept myself from going feral back then tho ;)
The point about not venting to colleagues deserves its own headline. When a boss undermines you, the temptation is to find allies by complaining, and it feels like relief, but it also hands the boss a second story to tell about you: that you are negative, that you gossip. Your notebook idea is the safer outlet. What happened, what was said, who was there, no interpretation. It keeps you factual in the moment and gives you something solid if you ever need HR or a new manager to understand the pattern. I write about this kind of situation in a book called WorkWars, for anyone who wants more on it; just message me [book].
Yes! It’s SO hard to resist but everything gets worse the moment you start. Thanks so much for reading and your thoughtful response!
Oof, I needed to read this today. It's too tempting to become bitchy and unprofessional when you feel like you are being slighted or diminished. Good article!
YES! It can be SO hard not to get alllll your defenses up!